There's this place I go to when I find out that another child/young adult has been gunned down in the streets of Chicago. Time and experience have taught me to take myself into a pattern of deep slow breathing and allow the tears to fall slowly. I have to pace myself to avoid falling into a black hole of grief that I can't climb out of. It's my way of not letting my feet slip into the cement blocks of depression from being blindsided by the pain of suffering another loss. I chose this title because it's true. After the vigils, after the tears, and after the brief mentions in the Chicago newspapers, everyone returns to their routines. Whether it's Parkland or Chicago, the noise eventually dies down and life seems to turn to business as usual...for some. Yesterday a member of a family I hold dear was murdered. It hurts, and I'm trying to make sense of it. Making a post on social media helped to express what I was feeling, but it doesn't change the reality that more... will die... this weekend and even more this summer. We know it, but are we really doing anything about it? My opinion is that we are not.
Don't get me wrong. I realize that this may come off as a sweeping indictment. I expect it to anger the people who believe they truly care for "these/those kids". It's just that I want us to care enough to stop it. I mean like end it. I want us to care as if our own babies are at risk for having their life snuffed out at any moment. I have high expectations for this city, our state, and our country. I applaud those people who are taking on the issues in real time and working to create meaningful solutions that address the myriad of layers here. Still, for the life of me, I can't understand how we have the resources to dig men out of hidden caves in foreign countries in the middle of the night, but as it relates to the little black bodies piling up in the city morgue, expressing sadness and apologizing is somehow sufficient. The sense of urgency that would make us take swift and aggressive action to take these guns out of the hands of senseless killers is missing.
There are a wealth of other issues crying out in the communities that are afflicted with these tragedies; however, the time it will take to ease the affects of mental illness, failing schools, absent fathers, unemployment, etc. does not address the crises happening in North Lawndale, Englewood, and the like. Even the "data-driven" policing I heard about recently does not deal with the root cause of the climbing death toll. Did you know Chicago's murder rates/numbers exceed New York's and LA's combined? It's jolting right? BUT if "the actual proves the possible", then it may also be promising. If we did something about it there, we can do something about it here in Chicago. I do wonder if Chicago's sophisticated segregation of the haves from the have nots (which also compartmentalizes racial groups), is what contributes to the lack of movement to end this?
You know where the guns and the shooters are. You know who is delivering them. Stop all of it. I tend to be extreme in my thinking. I will acknowledge that up front. America needs to get her house in order before we spend another dime/minute sweeping around other peoples' front doors. We all know these global interventions (aka hostile take overs) are just a disguise for our interests in controlling natural resources in other countries, but I digress... Charity begins at home, and while I applaud our efforts to be leaders in global citizenship, I also think it's time out for acting crazy. We've all heard that definition of insanity about doing the same thing repeatedly...
Newsflash:
It's not working.
The horse is dead.
The emperor is naked.
Not one of us would voluntarily commit the life of our child while we waited for local officials to figure things out, so let's stop asking poor black people to do it. It's bull shit, and y'all know how I feel about bull shit. One more child IS too many. I don't want to hold another mother weeping over the senseless murder of her son. There is no comfort for her. How do you answer a mother who expresses that she doesn't want to let her baby be forgotten in her helpless state of despair? Grappling with this is a part of the job description for many educators and leaders in the city of Chicago, and I know I can speak for many in saying we are tired and in over our heads.
In 2014, I buried one of my babies, an upstanding student at a high school I founded. Our school community was left devastated and robbed. In my state of grief, I expressed that I did not care if it took martial law to avoid another mother/father having to put their baby in the ground. I was attacked in the media which is fair. We live in a free country where everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but come on now. There is a time and a place for everything. I bring that up to ask though. How many more children have been murdered since December 2014? I just wonder how all of the parents and families of those who have had to see their loved one carted off in a black bag might feel about that. I'm not saying martial law is the solution, but cool out if you don't have one that is going to immediately eradicate this issue.
Those of us with the resources may very well have our children tucked away safely in neighborhoods or suburbs that significantly decrease the likelihood of them being shot down in the streets--infants and toddlers are not exempt. However, that does not change our civic duty and responsibility to solve this problem. We are too smart and too capable to continue pretending that we can't figure out a way to change these murder trends. Let's just pretend your child was at risk and could be next...
Keeping real, true, and free,
Garland Darling
