I recently watched Disney’s Frozen with my four year old son for the umpteenth time and again I felt compelled to blog about the depth of the epiphany Elsa has at end of the story. If you are not familiar with the movie, here is a quick summary of the plot. Elsa, the elder of two sisters, is born with special powers that attach her emotions to ice/winter. When she is a little girl, it is decided that it is best for her to hide her powers from others to avoid hurting or scaring people after an accident with her sister. When Elsa comes of age, she is crowned Queen. Shortly thereafter, she has an emotional outburst in a disagreement with her sister, Anna, and her secret powers are exposed. The townspeople react by accusing her of sorcery, so she flees to what she believes is the freedom to “Let It Go” (freely experience her powers). While she believes she has rid everyone of any potential danger her powers may bring about, her heightened state of fear, anger, anxiety, etc. sets off a perpetual winter. The remainder of the movie is about her sister Anna’s journey to reach her, get her to stop the snow, and attempt to restore the loving relationship they lost as children. Now, I know it’s just a children’s story, but we all know how deep Disney can get. There is a message here that I believe is worth lifting up, so I am responding to this nagging urge to capture it in writing.
LOVE THAWS
Toward the end of the movie Anna risks her life to save Elsa. Elsa becomes overwhelmed by her sister’s love and begins to reciprocate causing the eternal winter to stop. In this moment, she realizes that the antidote to controlling her powers is love. As she puts it, “Love thaws…” I see a parallel between the frozen and the broken heart. The human heart can become bitter, cold, or frozen from pain and trauma. As a woman who has experienced more than my share of heart break, I understand the difficulty in opening one’s self up to potentially being hurt again. We can then sabotage or avoid relationships as a means to protect ourselves. I don’t write this from a place of judgement because I understand very well what is at stake mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially, etc. when we get love wrong. This is why Elsa’s epiphany struck so close to home. You too may have a frozen heart. If you can find the right one, and I think this is the key, (real) love can and will thaw your frozen heart. We must have the faith to open up and let it in though.
BUT HOW??
It occurred to me in a recent mediation that in order to overcome this fear and anxiety of a negative outcome in love, one has to trust the process. As a Type A, Alpha Female I have a hard time even typing that. I know how counter-intuitive and difficult that can be for anyone like myself. It is not my nature to be process oriented. I am outputs driven and typically backwards plan my strategy from a result. Moreover, I can be very impatient and there is value in that as a leader who continuously drives and produces exceptional results.
However, not so with love. Once again, God has turned my thinking upside down. My focus and energy has to shift from attempting to control or predict the outcome to committing to trusting and enduring the process. This isn’t exclusive to love either. It can be applied to any goal. We can get caught up reacting to whether or not something is right, to a premature decision that we already know what is going to happen, or in being frustrated with the time and energy that has to be invested/risked for the desired outcome. But as they say in investments, “The bigger the risk, the bigger the pay off.”
THERE’S MORE
Allow me to shift away from Disney and activate your faith. Four important scriptures undergird this message.
Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. -Romans 12:21
Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God -1 John 4:7
The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Genesis 2:18
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (The Love Scripture—see image below)
If you need motivation to believe or understand the rationale for love to heal or “thaw” your broken heart. Remember the bible teaches us this in Romans when we are instructed not to repay evil for evil but instead to overcome evil with good. Essentially, Elsa was just preaching—lol. Seriously though, it can be instinctual to allow negative emotions to control our thinking/actions, and sometimes we don’t realize they are negative. We typically wouldn’t consider protecting ourselves to be negative; however, I blogged before about that being the work of God. He commands us to love, so go ahead and open heart as is further reinforced in the scripture from 1 John and numerous other places throughout the word. The other piece of this is that by closing ourselves to love, we deny God’s design and intention for man and woman.
We were created to be partners in this life, and despite modern and worldly thought, God intended for us to be together. We cheat ourselves when we close ourselves up from companionship, and the word clearly says it is not good for us. The last scripture which I share in an image below is important for you to keep top of mind when God unites you with the right partner. It should be your filter for identifying the man or woman who truly understands that love is not a flimsy word or feeling you can toss out and take back cavalierly. Love is a choice and commitment. Love itself is an ongoing process or a journey. When you truly love someone, it is not about evaluating or judging the other but instead aspiring to fulfill God’s commandment and embody that which we wish to be reciprocated.
All I can say is I hear you, God. I’m picking up what you’re putting down.
Keeping it real, true, and free,
Garland Darling
